funandfangs | Called you up in the middle of the night

Called you up in the middle of the night

Benny was still trying to get used to it up here, still trying to get his head around all this. Hell, half the time, it was hard to believe it was real... that he was back alive and had his second chance -- whatever he intended to do with that beyond killing his maker. He had no clue.

And he didn't have much of anybody up here.

He knew he said he wouldn't do it. It was supposed to be the end of the road for them, unless it was an emergency. But Benny wasn't doing all that great on his own. He needed a familiar voice, someone he could trust.

So that's why he got his phone out and dialed the only number he really had. Maybe Dean wouldn't appreciate the call - knew he probably wouldn't, but he let it ring anyway. When he heard Dean picking up, he cleared his throat.

"Hopin' I didn't wake you up now, brother," He drawled out as casually as he could make himself.

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Dean still wasn't sleeping much. He didn't sleep more than a couple hours at a stretch in Purgatory and it was a difficult habit to break. So when the phone rang, there was no hesitation on his part. Dean picked up the phone, slipping out of the motel room.

Just hearing that familiar drawl made the knot of tension in his chest loosen up a bit. It was supposed to be for emergencies only, but there were some things he'd never really be able to talk to Sam about.

"Hey Benny. Naw man, didn't wake me up. Just starin at the walls, trying not to go nuts. What's up?"

Something in Benny loosened up too and he tilted his head back as that tension eased out of his muscles. They might not be face to face, but hearing someone familiar made a world of difference.

"You and me, sounds like we're in the same boat again." He let out a weak chuckle. "Thought maybe we could meet up or something if you're close enough. Got a new bottle of whiskey with your name on it, if you want it."

For a year it had been the two of them against every fugly Purgatory tried to throw at them and for a year, they'd come out on top. So it's no surprise that they're both having issues adjusting. It's not the same and only Benny really gets it, no matter how many times Sammy tries to understand.

A smile tugs at him. How many times had they talked about that? A bottle and kicking back once they found Cas and got free?

"All right, Benny. You're on. Lemme know where you are and I'm on the way."

"Yeah, okay. Gonna send you my address." Phones were convenient things to have nowadays. He wasn't sure how he felt about them, most days, but at east it gave him a way to reach Dean. Right now, he needed that connection with somebody he knew.

Hanging up the phone, he gave Dean a quick text with his town and the motel he was crashing in for the day before he settled in to wait.

They were finally getting to do that plan of theirs. Drink a little - not that Benny could really get drunk - and just relax in a way they hadn't in a long damn time.

"All right man. 'll see you soon." And he feels better already. Glad that he gave Benny his number. So what if it's not really an emergency - right now Dean needs some sense of connection, something to help him make sense of the world around him.

Sam? He'll be fine. Working a minor case while Dean takes the Impala and hits the road without comment. He'll only be gone a few hours. Maybe crash for the day.

A fresh bottle of decent whiskey in hand, a few hours later Dean pounds his fist on the door. "Yo, Benny. You in there?"

When he heard the knock at the door, Benny got up to answer it, a ready grin on his face. "Told you I'd be here, didn't I?"

He took a step back to let Dean enter and motioned towards the table where he had the bottle sitting and a couple glasses. "Make yourself at home, brother."

"Damn it's good to see you." He catches Benny in a hug before pulling back to let himself into the room. Why was it easier to be more open with Benny? He's not going to overthink it, not going to examine it too closely. In Purgatory they never had time for it.

"You doin' okay, man?"

It's easy to return the hug and Benny doesn't really overthink it either or look too deep into it. They've been through a hell of a lot and back - and Dean's about the only person he can really trust up here right now. It's just good to have a familiar face.

"Still tryin' to adjust, I guess. Hard to believe I'm really back up here..." Keeps thinking maybe he cracked or something.

"You?" He heads over to the table to pour them both a drink. Benny couldn't really get drunk, but the burn of the whiskey as it worked its way down wasn't all that bad.

A familiar and trusted face. He doesn't think too deep about the hug, or even about Benny being a vampire. Benny is trusted and that's all that matters to Dean right now. Someone who had his back without question. Someone who didn't leave him behind.

He picks up the glass, downing most of it in a swallow, relishing the burn. How was he doing? That's a fairly good question. "Kind of miss the simplicity, you know? Us against them and no shades of grey."

"Yeah, I know... never really got it, you know? How much easier it was down there." It was all fighting and no worrying about cravings, no trying to adapt to a world he's been removed from for years. Things have changed so much since then...

He brings up his glass and downs half of it. "You find that brother of yours?"

Dean nods, finishing the rest of his glass and staring down into it, watching the last few drops swirl around at the bottom. "Yeah. It was a lot simpler. Didn't have time to think about much else but making it over the next hill, y'know?"

Sam. His chest goes tight all over again and he pours another glass. "Yeah, found him. Thought I was dead so.. so he moved on. Girl, a dog, the whole domestic thing."

And that's the one thing that always separated them. Sam could live without Dean. Dean? Was never so good at letting go. It's why he still felt adrift, disconnected from the world around him.

"Must've been a surprise to see you back in town then." He can see it the way Dean seems to react, the subtle changes. Benny could sympathize, what it felt like to come back and not have much of anything at all.

Well, he had revenge, but after that? He had no idea where he'd be going. Find a place, settle in maybe. Go home. Maybe he could find some family of his own somewhere.

"Does that mean you're flying solo now or did he come with you?"

"Yeah. Yeah, somethin' like that." He rolls the glass between his hands, a distant frown on his face. "Sammy, he.. came with. But I don't know if his heart's in it or if I should even be draggin him away from that apple pie life he always wanted, y'know?"

They fought like hell to get out, but when they got there.. there wasn't much left. All Dean had was Sammy and half the time it didn't feel like he was there. Not completely.

"Sorry, brother..." Benny wasn't sure what to say to make that alright. He knew family was important as hell... and when you didn't feel like you had it waiting? It stung.

"Just give it some time... You haven't been back all that long."

"I don't know. Maybe I should have let Sam be. Let him have that life." A weary sigh as he drags a hand across his face. Dean tips back the glass for another swallow.

"What about you, man? Makin any headway now that we're sprung?" Change of subject? Yes please.

Benny follows the change of subject - he's not going to prod Dean into talking about things he doesn't want to, not right now anyway. "Little bit. Mostly just tryin' to get used to things again."

He paused, staring down into his glass. "Hard to tell sometimes, how real all this is, you know? Took so much and so long to get out... can't believe it actually happened."

He huffs quietly, "Yeah. Didn't seem like we were ever gonna find the other side."

Reaching out, he nudges him. "But we did, man. You and me. We made it outta there just like we set out to."

"Yeah, guess we did..." He gave a look up, a smile tugging at his lips. They were out and free to do whatever they wanted, he supposed. Well, for the most part anyway.

He returned the nudge lightly before he going to refill their glasses. "Appreciate you coming out, by the way. Needed a familiar face tonight."

"Yeah. Know we said it'd only be emergencies but.. I needed this too." Something else he's not going to examine too closely. Or at all. Right now he can breathe a little easier and not jump at every shadow with Benny watching his back.

Purgatory was so much simpler. Was he a bad person for missing it? Dean didn't know anymore.

"Know I'm only a call away," He answered, relief in his expression. It was god to have the company. Reminded him of Purgatory... and man, Dean was right. It had been easier down there, so much more pure.

"Forgot what it was like almost, having somebody there to watch my ass. Hard to not feel like something's watching, waiting to attack, you know? We dealt with that too much down there."

"Yeah, know just what you mean." His smile is just as relieved as he finishes off his glass, starting to get pleasantly warm from the whiskey. "Always feel this itch right between my shoulder blades without you watchin' my back, man."

And maybe he shifted a little closer, enough to press his leg along Benny's. If they were back in Purgatory he'd probably already be on him, showing Benny exactly what he wanted.

Back here? Neither of them were on particularly solid ground at the moment.

Dean's close to him now, enough that he can feel his leg pressed up against his. It gets him to pause for a moment, consider his next move, but with Dean? It's easy. They get each other, even if they'd have been enemies up here, never would have gotten this close.

But his being a hunter or Benny being a vamp didn't really seem to matter to either one of them.

And in the end, he decides to move a little closer, reach out to rest a hand on Dean's shoulder again. He lets it linger this time, squeezing it lightly. "Yeah, well... you know you always got me watching your back, right? Owe you that much. Always just a call away."

And god help him, he's so starved for touch, the reassuring weight of Benny's hand on his shoulder sends his pulse tripping, flooding him with warmth. Hunter, vampire, none of that crap matters. Not after what they've been through. Having him this close just sends all those feelings Dean thought had been buried roaring back to the surface and for an instant, he can't breathe.

"Benny," he can barely grate out his voice. An unspoken plea that he knows Benny will understand. Please. I need this.

Benny noticed the change immediately. The way Dean seemed to be holding his breath, that look that was searching for something. Benny could walk away now, not complicate things further... or he could give into that part that's aching and alone out here, that needs something to hang on to.

Dean's looking for the same thing and they both know they can give it to each other.

Benny doesn't even try to justify it when he shifts from where he was sitting to get closer to Dean, lips catching his. It was a firm and reassuring kiss, answering that plea. Never been able to say no to Dean when he really needed something, especially when he could use the same thing.

Dean had been holding his breath. This was something he couldn't explain. Not to himself and sure as hell not to Sam. Benny had become more than just an ally and if they were both going to stay sane after Purgatory, they needed this. A reminder that they made it. They were alive.

He sinks into the kiss, tasting the smoke and heat of the whiskey on his lips.

No more thinking. His hand slides up his shoulder to cup the back of his neck and hold him there, lingering over the kiss. "I need this, Benny. I need you."

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Now that icons are done - back to this tag! <3

Yay for new icons!

Your icons are seriously amazing.

Aww, thank you! Glad you think so :D

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